clomid

(cycle 48, day 7)

how the hell has it been 48 cycles since my last birth control pill?!  : (

I picked up my first round of clomid last thursday. for 5 little pills, it was pretty expensive, but if I get a sticky THB from it, it'll be the best money I ever spent.

tonight is my last dose this cycle and so far I'm not noticing any side effects, except maybe a bit of a nagging headache, but its a dull, almost unnoticeable, headache. I was expecting to be a raging bitch already and other than being a bit more emotional that usual on Saturday, I wouldn't even really call any of this symptoms of the clomid. maybe I'm just lucky to not be experiencing any.

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't at least a little unsettling to not be experiencing any side effects. I've heard so many stories of women dealing with hot flashes, headaches, raging hormones, the list goes on, but I'm not getting any of it. at least not yet. i'll be honest that I don't really know when most of those symptoms start showing up, but I figured it would be only a couple days after starting them, which should be by now, but nothing. I wish there was a way to know earlier if its doing its job or not sooner than getting a positive OPK, like say the last dose there was a test to somehow tell you that, yes, its working, you have x amount of follicles growing and should O in x amount of days. if only, eh?

I've heard a lot of success stories about women only needing to do one cycle to get a BFP, so of course that's also in the back of my mind right now. I have so much hope for this cycle, but there's also that other half of me saying that if it hasn't happened by now, what difference would clomid make? but again, so many other women try without success, use clomid, and bam, pregnant.

I hate ttc.